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To help To help Someone Whose Loved One Is Dying
A news of a dying loved one could make us undergo a series of emotional turmoils. Most of religions have their own interpretations of what happens to us after death. Whether we’re members of a religion or not, it is natural for us to experience a certain degree of fear once we speak about death especially when we cannot exactly know what our loved one is experiencing.
A “flight or fight” response is our initial reaction to fear. Knowing a few loved one’s nearing death can surprise you in a way that you’ve got difficulty in informing others about it. Your daily routine changes as you make time for visitations. Or, you begin to weave black feel angry after concentrating on the medical aspects comparable to why the doctor’s findings weren’t clarified to you or your loved one earlier. Negative emotions may emerge, and since we cannot run away or fight against death, these emotions will be manifested in other areas of our lives, or in our personal relationships.
Family tensions are quite normal in a daily basis. However, these worsen the moment we start to release pent-up emotions from the situation. An example of a “flight response” is how a family member who’s reluctant to stop by for a visit becomes the focal point. This release of bottled-up emotions can easily shift between “flight” and “fight.” A slight issue transcends into a significant conflict. The family member, for example, might drop by for a visit, but since he was also dealing together with his own “flight response” and came at a later time than most, making himself a recipient of angry stares and comments.
These are aspects of the “pre-grieving” process which is often known as “anticipatory grief” by chaplains. medical staff, and social workers. It’s essential to acknowledge the subtle fear that is hidden amongst the many emotions we’re having previous to and during visits with our loved one. It is vital that we acknowledge this fear as an important coping mechanism to any difficult situation. This aids us to redirect our thoughts and emotions towards our loved one, providing them and ourselves the perfect environment for their final moments.
As we conquer our fear on death and dying, we start to open up our eyes towards the feelings of our loved ones about their situation. Those might be similar or more intense than ours. Our energies might be aimed toward caring and reassuring them. How we do that is determined by how close we’re to the dying person in addition to their own characteristics and principles. Dying could also be a morbid topic to discuss but it surely doesn’t should be that way. A bit of humor, done appropriately, might be a strong way for family and friends to deal with their loved one.
In all of this, take your cues from the one who is dying. If they are up to a gentle playfulness, engage them in a story you understand they are going to enjoy, perhaps a well-known family faux pas or something silly the newest nephew or niece recently said. Hold their hand, look into their eyes. You, your loved one and surrounding family and friends will discover once again that love is essentially the most powerful emotion we humans have, and that while it cannot change the fact that death is a difficult experience, it could actually uplift us through those times, leaving us with abiding memories of the last time(s) we were with our loved one.
Discover how Chaplain Marilyn Morris helps those whose loved ones are dying. Learn how her stories inform and edify you as you deal with or help others with dying loved ones. This free 45 minute audiobook provides wonderfully helpful yet “gentle” insights, ideas border-width:3px;color:grey;padding:10px;margin-top:38px;margin-bottom:40px;”>Incoming Article Search Engine Terms:
how to assist those whose loved one is dying
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